"I had been involved in abusive situations. You are afraid to leave because you know he will find you. He holds a gun to your head you beg him to pull the trigger but he hits you over the head with it. He lies and makes excuses, takes everything you have. Including your self-respect ..."
Those were the comments of one Dora, in the comments section of one of my posts earlier this week on Facebook, on the dreaded topic of #DomesticViolence - and the wrongs of the Criminal Justice System many would rather prefer to hush about. But what is it to NOT talk, or want to openly discuss? That a malevolent person who self-confessed and proclaimed that they love you would all of a sudden now turn around, ready to violate you?
1. Domestic violence crime is usually is perpetrated by one person who preys upon another person's love, with the aim of doing or causing them harm, if not to exterminate them. It is a crime of passion. Come to think of it, you wouldn't let your guard down for a stranger, or would you?
2. It is a crime; is a crime, is a CRIME! make no mistake about it. Enough of hypocritical Judges who pretend to not be able to read in between the lines of traumatic, emotional disorders less visible OR see the obvious transgressions caused/done by a sufferer because the alleged offender is an accomplished, standing member of the society. Like a Medical Doctor, a Cop, a Professor - or even a Pastor!
3. Discrepancies in the Criminal Justice System vary. For instance, the Police Department has a policy of always protecting her own until stark-naked facts prove otherwise. The Criminal Justice System needs officials with hearts, who can detect when though abuse is not obvious to the naked eye, it can be subterraneanly suppressed in regressed emotions. They need to also begin to open their minds to the truth that men too suffer domestic violence from their spouses and the shame culture that makes men repress and suffer in silence needed to be canceled. That in my opinion is one of the viable, cancel-cultures that should ever exist.
Should you be a sufferer of domestic abuse, and are reading this, please reach out with a great deal of caution and wisdom to your nearest law-enforcement teams for intervention. It is WRONG to keep quiet. One of the UK Government's initiatives is the ANI - Ask for Action Needed Immediately code-word at Pharmacy-counters all across the nation. OR call Refuge’s National Domestic Abuse Helpline for free and confidential advice, 24 hours a day on 0808 2000 247 or through the contact form or live chat service. If you are a male victim, you can access support through the Men’s Advice Helpline on 0808 8010327. Other specialist support services are available. If you are in immediate danger, call 999 and ask for the police. (Ask for the relevant authorities to speak to in your respective countries!)