Domestic violence is NOT just a misdemeanor. It is a criminal act. It is wrong on ALL levels: Think with me -
1. God created human beings in His express image in their spirit. And He promises to punish anyone that attempts to/destroys that image;
2. Domestic violence/abuse not only destroys the spirit but also destroys the mind;
3. Countless millions have lost their lives due to unforeseen, unbelievable, reprehensible, horrific attacks from the aggressor on their victims, allowed by the lapses of judgment in the Criminal Justice System. And this has to STOP. ✋ Period!
Or just justify to me, how you as a Judge could send the lady back home to the highly qualified Medical Doctor with a huge salary and a huge home saying to his spouse: "Your home is large enough for both to co-exist peacefully!"
What of the safety of the children? And where's equality under the law, for the refuge-protection of the abused spouse?
Studies have revealed that highly qualified professionals who are narcissistic usually get away with their crimes just because the System keeps refusing to believe they are capable of committing the alleged crimes they have been reported to commit!
Methinks the legal requirement that forces abused persons to sit in court to face their abusers - or their case will be thrown out of court NEEDED TO BE REDRESSED. If fear of meeting the abuser has been implanted already in the abused person, why would the legal system still mandate a sit-in appearance of the appellant?
That brings me to my fourth point;
4. STOP DISMISSING male victims of Domestic Violence. That Police culture/training of the dark ages that receives a call from a female-abuser asking the assistance of law enforcement officers to intervene after she had violated the male, NEEDS TO BE REDRESSED also. In most cases, the male had not called the Police first, because of either the shame-culture associated with been beaten or aggravated by his spouse. Or because of the Police-culture of perception that the male is ALWAYS the aggressor and perpetrator of Domestic Violence crimes, and as such should be removed and high-handedly dealt with! Many innocent males had lost their dear lives or had received eternal wounds in their body-parts in this miscarriage of justice.
Many citizens there still are who do NOT believe that females too could inflict Domestic Violence harms on their male-spouses because the female "is the weaker-framed vessel", as they say. I say: "You are as crazy as hell!" Studies reveal that 1 in 5 females and 1 in 7 males have been domestically violated in heinous crimes under different roofs. I was in an abusive marriage for a decade, and I had been told by my abuser: "You'd better shut up; what happens under this roof stays under this roof because if you say a word, your public ministries and teaching career will be over!" And she was right! I had to seek a divorce, be separated from harm's way, cater for, and protect my five kids - four of whom had been under age 3 (they were two sets of twins and a lone oldest sibling at 5). Custodial battles dragged for three more years after Decree Absolute of 2007. Professional classroom teaching career spasmodically was interrupted for sudden referrals to the Social Service or the Police, or summons to the court so much that the emotional and physical energies were all sapped out of me at the snap of two fingers! On the ministerial front, many were as surprised as you reading this that I had chosen to end my marriage. And without hearing a word from myself but only the other side, they had chosen sides. I had become an abhorrence, and they had left in hordes. Today, sixteen years later, God has vindicated me. Everyone's eyes have been opened. Truth has prevailed without saying a word. ALL my five children have achieved statuses of importance - and are still achieving in righteousness. But God is also rebuilding and re-branding me: I had gone further ahead to achieve more, academically. God had opened doors for me to minister on four of the seven of the world's continents. I had published ten life-changing book-titles read across the world, and I am still writing! Ministries generally marked its tenth year of rising from the ashes here in the UK, in 2020. God has been faithful!
Why have I written, thus? Because I am still hurt? NO! God has vindicated me!! And is still working with and through me.
Rather, I have written this to be a voice to the voiceless, abused, unbelieved souls out there betrayed to their death or mental-disrepair by the Criminal Justice Systems of the lands. DOMESTIC VIOLENCE IS A HEINOUS CRIME. The criminal justice system should see it as such. Enough of slap-on-the-wrist judgments, PLEASE!
(Picture credit: Julie Kosolapova)
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